Random Thoughts

Three people in my life so far, I have loved them.They told me that they: Loved Adored Needed Wanted Me. I doubt anyone will ever feel that deeply for me. I don't even care if they fall out of love in time. I just want someone to love me so much that they fall in love with me and swim in the ultimate connection of being "at one" with me. Two complementary souls, blending with each other, happy to be mirrors. I would think that it's going to be a fantasy for me the rest of my life. But I met a girl online on some social media site. Everyday at least twice I think about this girl who I really love and she likes me back. The problem is that I live in Delhi and she lives in Chandigarh. I haven't seen her, we were thinking of having a long distance relationship. It's hard because we can't be together in person. We are in contact with each other, but it's not easy and emotional. I actually cry at night sometimes and I know it isn't right for guy like mys

I screamed but no one hears, I failed trying to communicate I can see everyone but no one hears me. No one really listens all they hear is from their own heart, their own desires, their own ambition. Today Siting in my office all alone feeling very much disowned by my office colleague and my friends. These days I am very much upset can't find way to escape, don't have enough courage to fight the situation. I don't know ke mai apni baate kis se bolu . So I thought to write it down I have been having tons of dreams about her my first love but the strange thing is her fiance is in all of them. In my last dream. I was some how homeless and she let me stay with her and her fiance (who was kind of senior in my office) I just remember that in the dream she was around a lot but was very cold to me yet at the same time very concerned. I remember a lot of old emotions coming back and me wanting her acceptance. We were together her living room and me leaving the house telling her I w