Showing posts with label First Love. Show all posts
Showing posts with label First Love. Show all posts

Monday, December 28, 2009

Falling in Love

Three people in my life so far, I have loved them.They told me that they:
Loved
Adored
Needed
Wanted
Me.

I doubt anyone will ever feel that deeply for me. I don't even care if they fall out of love in time. I just want someone to love me so much that they fall in love with me and swim in the ultimate connection of being "at one" with me. Two complementary souls, blending with each other, happy to be mirrors.

I would think that it's going to be a fantasy for me the rest of my life. But I met a girl online on some social media site. Everyday at least twice I think about this girl who I really love and she likes me back. The problem is that I live in Delhi and she lives in Chandigarh. I haven't seen her, we were thinking of having a long distance relationship. It's hard because we can't be together in person. We are in contact with each other, but it's not easy and emotional. I actually cry at night sometimes and I know it isn't right for guy like myself to do that. I just miss her and can't stop thinking about her. I love her. I will never tell my friends and family that I cry sometimes about this. It would be embarrassing.

I hope I can meet someone around me to read this, having the same problem as me. I just don't know what to do...

Wednesday, November 25, 2009

Dream

I screamed but no one hears, I failed trying to communicate I can see everyone but no one hears me. No one really listens all they hear is from their own heart, their own desires, their own ambition. Today Siting in my office all alone feeling very much disowned by my office colleague and my friends.

These days I am very much upset can't find way to escape, don't have enough courage to fight the situation. I don't know ke mai apni baate kis se bolu . So I thought to write it down

I have been having tons of dreams about her my first love but the strange thing is her fiance is in all of them. In my last dream. I was some how homeless and she let me stay with her and her fiance (who was kind of senior in my office) I just remember that in the dream she was around a lot but was very cold to me yet at the same time very concerned. I remember a lot of old emotions coming back and me wanting her acceptance. We were together her living room and me leaving the house telling her I was going for ever and I tried to kiss her and she turned away.

I know that she doesn't love me...still I love her ...,I know she isn't into me and I should leave but one part of mine doesn't want to..
why doesn't she love me the same I love her... :( :(

love hurts.....

Some earlier posts

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